Dan Marbes

It’s amazing how fast time seems to fly by, encapsulating all of the things we did and meant to do in one great flurry. Hard to believe it’s been nearly three months since I’ve found time to write!

Lately, I’ve been thinking about names. No, I’m not expecting but I find the topic fascinating. One of the core tenets in this blog and a great deal of what I try to convey about leadership is acknowledging people as people, not simply as cogs in some grand machine (irrespective of their professional contributions, status, or title). At some fundamental level I believe that this is accomplished by understanding a person’s real identity. Who are they, what are they about and how can I relate those experiences?

I wonder if any attribute is more closely identified with that concept of identity than a person’s name? In many cases, a person’s name has been around longer than they have. Parents spend countless hours trying to decide the perfect name, one that reflects a part of the familial heritage in some cases or one that speaks to virtues and traits the parents hope the child will espouse. It can convey a sense of individuality (check out http://bit.ly/rtuGtb for an interesting look at some alternate spellings of common names) or stand unaltered representing generations past. Further still, as some children grow they may choose to adopt a shortened version of their given name, take their middle name as their preferred name or go so far as to have their name legally changed. Long before we meet someone in a professional capacity, this identity has been forged and defined.

Over these last few months, one of the things I’ve noticed about the workplace is just how bad people are with names.Whether it’s a misspelling in an email or a mispronunciation on a conference call, gaffes seem increasingly common. While these errors offer up an air of sloppiness as do other verbal and written miscues, I wonder if in this case the actual impact of the error runs deeper. By not knowing my name or not making an effort to reproduce it correctly, what have you told me about how you value me as a person?

Think back to the first day of school for a moment. I suspect we all remember roll call, listening to teachers struggle with less common names. As a person with a last name that was often mispronounced in that exercise I can tell you that those few minutes were always a source of great dread. Kids being kids, once the teacher had mispronounced a student’s name it would be repeated ad nauseum in the halls and at recess, and subliminally it was easy to feel devalued from the continued mockery. For many adults, the impact of hearing their name “butchered” draws a similar response.

In our corporate cultures, we interact with people from all over the globe and with increasing frequency our primary communication paths are not face-to-face. When email, instant message and conference calls become those primary vehicles for collaborating and thereby building relationships it seems to me that the extra few seconds it takes to cross reference a name spelling or to make sure we know how to pronounce those seemingly difficult names will return dividends of engagement far beyond our expenditure.

This entry was posted on August 3, 2011 at 4:52 pm and is filed under Identity, Leadership. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.